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Braving "robbing the cradle" jokes, almost one-third of women between ages 40 and 69 are dating younger men (defined as 10 or more years younger). According to a recent AARP poll, one-sixth of women in their 50s, in fact, prefer men in their 40s.

It's not what you think -- the stamina or "re-boot" ability of the younger male. The women like the flexibility and sense of adventure of their more spontaneous, younger companions, Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D., a licensed family therapist in practice in Long Beach, Calif., and author of "The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again", tells WebMD. For their part, the men like the sophistication and life success of their older mates, she explains. The much touted idea that women peak sexually in their 30s and men in their teens does not enter into it -- most of these couples are beyond both those age periods.

But what about the notion that men are "hard-wired" to seek a smooth-faced, curvy receptacle for reproduction and thus are drawn to younger women? "Humans are relatively flexible species," Michael R. Cunningham, Ph.D., a psychologist in the department of communications at the University of Louisville, tells WebMD. "Factors other than biological can be attractive. You can override a lot of biology in pursuit of other goals."

Interestingly, Cunningham did an unpublished study of 60 women in their 20s, 30s, and 40s, who were shown pictures of men aged to those decades. "The women," he says, "were more interested in men their own age or older."

Getting over the "shoulds"
"We have strong 'shoulds' on ways of partnering up," Kathryn Elliott, Ph.D., assistant professor of psychology at the University of Louisiana at Lafayette, explains to WebMD. "We are victims of inner-critic constrictedness. We think we should only weigh 120. We should marry people within two years of our age. We pathologize anything that isn't within those shoulds."

The key to making older women/younger man relationships work, Elliott says, is to match what she calls voltages. "Choose someone who is your voltage type -- has the same level of intensity about life. If the voltages are different, one becomes the pursuer and one the distancer. This can create pain."

Dealing with the flak
Susan Winter is co-author, with Felicia Brings, of "Older Women, Younger Men: New Options for Love and Romance". She is 48 and has been in a relationship with a man 20 years younger since 1992. Before that, she hooked up with two men 16 years younger and another 20 years younger.

She works out a lot by her own admission (and judging by her track record in this department) and often meets partners at the gym, not the bars.
Winter tells WebMD that she and her co-author interviewed more than 200 couples for their book. Though hardly a scientific study, the research surfaced three myths such couples hear every time:

Age disparity in sexual relationships and sexual relationships between individuals of a significant difference in age have been documented for most of recorded history and have been regarded with a wide range of attitudes, from normalized acceptance to taboo . Concepts of these relationships and of the exact definition of a "significant" age disparity have developed over time and vary between societies, [1] legal systems (particularly with regards to the age of consent ), [2] and ethical systems . These views are rarely uniform even within cultures and are affected by views of consent , marriage , and gender roles , and by perceptions of social and economic differences between age groups.

Relationships with age disparity of all kinds have been observed with both men and women as the older or younger partner. In various cultures, older men and younger women often seek one another for sexual or marital relationships. [7] Older women sometimes date younger men as well, [8] and in both cases wealth and physical attractiveness are often relevant. Nevertheless, because men generally are interested in women in their twenties, adolescent boys are generally sexually interested in women somewhat older than themselves. [9]

In August 2010, Michael Dunn of the University of Wales Institute, Cardiff completed and released the results of a study on age disparity in dating. Dunn concluded that "Not once across all ages and countries ... did females show a preference for males significantly younger than male preferences for females" and that there was a "consistent cross-cultural preference by women for at least same-age or significantly older men". A 2003 AARP study reported that 34% of women over 39 years old were dating younger men. [16]

A 2011 study suggested that age disparity in marriage is positively correlated with decreased longevity, particularly for women, though married individuals still have longer lifespans than singles. [17]

Explanations for age disparity usually focus on either the rational choice model or the analysis of demographic trends in a society. [3] The rational choice model suggests that people look for partners who can provide for them in their life (bread-winners); as men traditionally earn more as they get older, women will therefore prefer older men. [3] This factor is diminishing as more women enter the labor force and the gender pay gap decreases. [3] The demographic trends are concerned with the gender ratio in the society, the marriage squeeze , and migration patterns. [3] Another explanation concerns cultural values: the higher the value placed in having children, the higher the age gap will be. [12]

In a Brown University study, it has been noted that the social structure of a country determines the age difference between spouses more than any other factor. [1] One of the concerns of relationships with age disparities in some cultures is a perceived difference between people of different age ranges. These differences may be sexual, financial or social in nature. Gender roles may complicate this even further. Socially, a society with a difference in wealth distribution between older and younger people may affect the dynamics of the relationship. [18]

Although the " cougar " theme, in which older women date much younger men, is often portrayed in the media as a widespread and established facet of modern Western culture, at least one academic study has found the concept to be a "myth". A British psychological study published in Evolution and Human Behavior in 2010 concluded that men and women, in general, continued to follow traditional gender roles when searching for mates. The study found that, as supported by other academic studies, most men preferred younger, physically attractive women, while most women, of any age, preferred successful, established men their age or older. The study found very few instances of older women pursuing much younger men and vice versa. [19]

The "never date anyone under half your age plus seven" rule is a rule of thumb sometimes used to prejudge whether an age difference is socially acceptable. [20] [21] [22] Although the origin of the rule is unclear, it is sometimes considered to have French origin. [20]

When it comes to dating, there’s an unscientific, but prevailing opinion that older men want younger women and vice versa. Turns out, the opposite may be true for women on the online dating scene. Numbers culled from various dating sites have consistently shown both sexes prefer to date down the age spectrum rather than up.

AYI (Are You Interested?), is one of the largest websites and apps designed to help users find their mates, but it works in an unconventional way.  Users allow the app to access their Facebook profile, and people are then are paired based on interests. To sweeten the appeal, AYI also flags any mutual friends the prospective pair share. Users who like what they see  “fave” the profile. If not, they can click “skip.”

AYI pulled data from its 68 million downloads and 20 million Facebook profiles to see which subscribers are making successful matches. It focused in on the 1 million recommended pairings in a specific population of 35,942 users ages 30 to 49. The surprising finding: a woman was  five times more likely to show interest in a man was five years her junior that one who was five years older. If only the men would catch on. Among the 26,434 men ages 30 to 49, 42% wouldn’t even consider a woman if she was older than him. However, if contacted by an older woman, men wouldn’t necessarily turn her down. The data shows that a man is only 22% less likely to respond to an older woman than a younger woman if she initiates contact.

What are some of the reasons for this? AYI analysts suspect that younger women are inundated by requests from older men and while that might once have had some appeal—in a marrying-for-wealth sort of way— it simply doesn’t anymore. A 2008 study published in the journal Psychology of Women Quarterly  foind that women who are 10 or more years older than their partner report more satisfaction and relationship commitment compared to women who are the same age or younger than their partner.

“We don’t know for sure, but it may be because when the woman is older, it shifts the traditional heterosexual power dynamic toward greater equality. We know from a lot of research that greater equality tends to make couples happier,” writes study author Dr. Justin Lehmiller,   a social psychologist in the Department of Psychology at Harvard University in his blog, the Psychology of Human Sexuality .

Based on the findings, AYI Director of Product Insights, Josh Fischer, says men will get more online dating responses if they don’t confine themselves to only connecting with younger women, and women should continue to initiate contact with men they think they will like–especially if they’re younger.

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The younger man who has a sexual encounter with an older woman will remember it as some of the best sex of his life. The benefits will continue when the young man is ready for a relationship with a girl of his age. One result to having experienced sex with a cougar is that the attraction may end up becoming his "type."

The  cougar age alone means many more years of experience with multiple partners. Before marriage, they may have had a few partners. After divorce, the notches on their bedposts may have gone up exponentially.

Cougars have been in long term relationships and marriages, which have provided years of sexual experience with one partner. Those memories are implanted into the older woman's brain and, whether good or bad, have shaped her sexual expertise.

Their self-awareness comes from years of experience and communicating with sexual partners. They've tried different positions, techniques, and fetishes. They've self-pleasured themselves for many years, and aren't afraid of communicating the stuff that really gets them purring .

And they are eager to find out the specific desires of their current boyfriend. They've been taught by a variety of partners which positions and techniques turn men on. They ask questions and figure out what makes their man roar like the king of a lion's den. What they don't know, they will research in books, movies or on the Internet.

They don't have any delusions that they are going to hook this man into marriage and/or start a family . This takes the pressure off a man who just wants to have fun without obligations. This stress relief is a major reason sex is great with an older woman who isn't as needy or demanding. 

She may have been in a marriage where sex was withheld . She won't use sex as a bargaining chip or try to get something materialistic from the younger man. Cougars know the psychological and physical benefits to regular sex.

It's a challenge to be with an attractive, sexy older lady who is physically fit and keeps herself well groomed. She has the time to take care of herself since her children are older and less dependent.

Older women dating is a big trend nowadays, we realize that there are many older women who would like to date with younger men, and we also recognize that people in 40 or older love younger women, so whatever you are looking for younger men or you are older men looking for younger women , even you love senior dating, this senior dating agency are your home

It is said that love just come in your life at a right time and at a right moment. There are also other people who say that you really don’t need to wait for love to come into your life. Sometimes you also need to search for it. But which of these is true? They say that if it is really your destiny not to end up finding your true love, there is no way that you can never break away from it. But today, even if you are already in your 40’s or even higher, there is one of the best older women dating sites best to find true love.
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For older women looking for younger men, the Older Women Dating Site is only one of the best dating sites that you can join to find the perfect date of your life. This site guarantees of giving you a new way of meeting an average guy that will lead you to an exciting relationship.

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Dating is an activity that most people undergo in looking for a special someone. The good thing about this activity is that there are no age limitations for you to have a love life. In order for you to believe, there are now available sites for dating for over 50 or older men and women. These sites provide and support singles to have a place where they can easily find dates. If you are one of those people who are interested, this is the best site that is recommended for you .This is the dating site for over 50. This site will be the best way to find the perfect match for you.

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AgeMatch.com is among the dating websites that gives single Men and Women over 50 all around the world who are interested in getting a future partner through online conversations and getting to know each other over the Internet. It is known to be the world’s first, widest and most effective dating website that is committed to satisfying the needs of certain people who would like to meet someone older or younger than they are. People like older men looking for younger women , older men seeking younger men, older men dating younger women, younger women looking for older men or younger women dating older men.

She was then 34. I was 53. Tomorrow, we will celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary with our two little girls (passers-by on the pavement routinely take me to be their grandfather). So, despite the age gap, something appears to have been right between us.

Now 67, I am the same age as Ronnie Wood, whose marriage to Sally – a woman three decades younger – featured in the Telegraph yesterday . Bryony Gordon’s affectionate profile made it look like a happy marriage with no illusions on the bride’s behalf. “I know the age gap is there,” said Sally. “I wish it wasn’t.”

My wife would say the same. She has said she wishes she had met me 10 years earlier and wishes, also, that there might have been 10 years fewer difference between us. When she had perhaps drunk a glass of wine too many one evening some years ago, she did admit that she feared being a widow at 60; but it is also true that, before we married, she called me “the nicest boyfriend I have ever had” and, within living memory, she said that she wouldn’t swap me for Brad Pitt. Perhaps, again, it was the wine talking.

And that is even without my having the obvious, overwhelming attractions of that shrivelled, wizened midget Ronnie Wood. If I’d amassed a share of the Rolling Stones pension pot, alleged to amount to £1bn, it might have been more obvious what my wife saw in me. As it is, however, the last 14 years have not only been the happiest of my life: they have also brought me a level of financial security I have never known – owing, in large part, to sharing my life for the first time with a wife with whom it is possible to talk and plan sensibly about money.

Nevertheless, I do know from personal experience that money can exert an attraction for some women. The only time in my life I was ever left by a woman for an older man, I did suspect that his possession of many millions of pounds, houses and flats and a big yacht might have had some bearing on the decision. The fact that he looked like a sack of wet sawdust and had the conversational talents of a clogged drain did not seem to come into the reckoning. I should not have been surprised. The same woman had once told me “Money is what women care about most of all” and, while she was obviously speaking for herself, she may also have been voicing the general approach to sex and marriage of a certain category of womanhood.

Felix Dennis, the near-billionaire publisher who recently died, negotiated many decades with women on an emotionless calculation of their material interests. Despite having all the physical attractions of a Hobbit, Felix regularly filled his houses with beautiful half-naked women decades younger than himself - acting on the principle, as he put it so appealingly, that you should always rent “anything that floats, flies or f---s”. Given that attitude, it may not be surprising that he never married and never had children. Apparently, he recognised at the end of his life that he had lost out there.

It was never difficult to work out why those girls were taking their clothes off for Felix; but, if it’s a mystery what my young wife sees in me or Sally Wood sees in Ron, how much more baffling is the attraction of Francois Hollande for a succession of fantastically beautiful, clever and talented women? Daniel Craig or Daniel Day-Lewis might count themselves lucky to have a chance with Segolene Royale; yet this balding little tub in the teacherly specs, looking ridiculously nerdy in his helmet on his pop-pop scooter, manages not only to pull the gorgeous 42-year-old Julie Gayet but, apparently, persuades her to agree to marry him soon, on his 60th birthday.

What on earth has he got? Surely it can’t just be a matter of the red carpets, the presidential palace, the flying columns of outriders and the dinners with heads of state? Surely no right-thinking, self-respecting woman could be that shallow?

Today, younger men are pursuing older women with surprising vigor. So, at 50, you can date men 10, 15 ... even 20 years younger than you as well as men your own age and older. That's a lot of choices, right?

By the time you reach 50, you know yourself pretty well. That means you have more self-confidence, which is very attractive to all men. A confident woman isn't clingy, needy or desperate. She has her own life and is more likely to not need as much attention from a man — cougars are sexy for this very reason. You are just easier to spend time with and a lot less demanding than younger women.

You look younger and hotter than ever. Have you been to a class reunion lately? The women look fantastic. Women are taking better care of themselves and doing more to stay young looking. And compared to men, women have so much more to rely on with good skin care, exercise, the right clothing, hair and makeup and maybe a little Botox. All this gives you a younger appearance — certainly younger than previous generations at the same age. Some experts are claiming 50 is the new 30. Imagine that!

Now that you have entered your fifth decade, you have plenty of experience under your belt. Younger men find this exciting and are often seeking to learn more about how to please a woman in the bedroom. This can be a lot of fun as you show him what women like and educate him for younger generations. What a great service you are doing for womankind!

In addition, a younger man's youthful exuberance can bring a lot of fun to dating overall. He is not yet stuck in his ways and is far more likely to try new things with a sense of adventure. They might want to try new foods and restaurants, new cultural experiences, new social activities, new sports and even new positions.

Once you move into your 50s, you are usually beyond the child-bearing phase. The female biological clock has stopped that super loud ticking that you may have heard in your late 30s and into your early 40s. This can be a huge relief to some young men who don't want to get tied down by younger women who want to start a family.

These men are open to relationships , they just don't want that long-term commitment and family responsibility. So you offer him a great opportunity for companionship and romance without the pressure of marriage.

At 50, you are savvy about how the world works. That means you know that dating a younger man may be a heckuva lot of fun, but it also might not lead to anything deeper or serious. That is fine by you. You don't mind a little romantic distraction and feel flattered and enlivened by a younger man's attention. Yet, you recognize that your relationship is not as likely to last long-term.

Olderwomendating is a classy, fun and effective cougar brand that encourages older women and younger men to meet and date. Once you join this dedicated dating site, you are matched with other people of the opposite gender who are looking for the same thing you are. We are very handy if there is something you are looking for in particular and in this case that would be an older woman or a younger man. It's a very established site which has been around for more than a decade and it's FREE to join.

We would like to thank all the people at olderwomendating.com for the perfect service they have provided. We met through this site, and we were brought together because of this site. Age doesn't matter, just follow your hearts and nothing is impossible. Efficient customer service and you will never miss every chance to know the people nearby. Once again, we appreciate the site.

 

 

 

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